Solving the Work Life Balance Equation

That constant feeling of dissatisfaction is what had started bothering me. It didn’t matter how hard I tried, with each passing day the bar seemed to be set either too high or I was just not upto the mark. I have always thought of myself as being a conscientious worker and a positive person but this phase was just making me doubt my own capabilities. It had started affecting my attitude, my way of approaching things, from being an eternal optimist to being defensive about every small lil thing that was intruding in this personal space of mine that was contributing to me being miserable at all times. My Eureka moment i.e. the day I realized I needed to get out of this mess : was when I failed to appreciate the good things happening to people who mattered to me.

I call this phase of my life as the “My life is  Screwed Phase”.  In short, it’s a phase where you just can’t seem to handle the responsibilities that work , taking care of financial responsibilities and managing a home seem to bring with them together.

It is something most of us go through but refuse to acknowledge. So how do you go consciously go about making life easier for yourself.

• Recognize the need for Self Appreciation: This is one of the most crucial things and often the most neglected one. No one can make you better if you choose to devote yourself to the downward spiral. Be happy and see value in the things you do. It would be difficult to start with but a genuine attempt at it will bear meaningful results over time. It could be as simple as sitting down with a friend and asking him/her about 5 good things that he/she sees in you. Every time you use one of these qualities to do or achieve something in your professional or personal life, give yourself a pat on the back.
• Accept the fact that you can’t please everybody: Even a high flying executive making truckloads of money would have to go back home to a family who would crib for want of adequate time. So realize which phase of life you are in and accordingly attach precedence to work or family.
• Go out and take help from people/tools that make life easier: This one is especially for all the ladies out there. If having a maid at home who cooks and cleans after you would mean that it eases out your stress for that one hour, please go ahead and make that choice. No – You don’t have to feel guilty about her taking care of things at home, definitely not because it’s supposed to be your “moral responsibility”.You could use the benefits of e-tailing by shopping for groceries online.It would mean spending some quality time doing things you like over the weekend rather than spending a few frustrating hours in departmental store queues.
• Steer away from comparisons: No two people are alike. Neither do they have the same circumstances. We need to realize that no one else wears the same shoe so why waste time and effort in making meaningless comparisons. For all I know, we always tend to compare ourselves with people who are in a better position than where we are. If it’s a motivating factor for you, don’t cease to continue. But for a majority, it tends to be a benchmark which they wish to achieve and in the process tend to be unhappy about the things they miss out on.
• Make time for yourself: This will give you time to unwind and it won’t make you feel like you are constantly moving from one task to the next. Spend this time in doing things you like. You could read a book, hit the gym, join a dance class or anything that ensures that your “me” time freshens you up.
• Look at what you have achieved rather than what you couldn’t make time for: The day you couldn’t make time for your kids sports meet, you probably cracked a big deal at work. Don’t be harsh on yourself. Look at the positive aspect. Let go and make peace with yourself.
• Travel: Its enriching. Meeting new people, experiencing different cultures and the novelty of changing landscapes rejuvenates you. It broadens your perspective and makes you realize the importance of small pleasures of life.
• Don’t associate happiness with material things: Because there is no upper limit. And most of it is not need based.
• Learn to say no:  Say no to things you don’t want to do. Say no to things that make you unhappy. Say no to people you don’t wish to interact with.

Picking up a few of these would definitely go a long way in beating the blues and maintaining your sanity. I would encourage you to leave your feedback and add onto the list of things that have helped you to handle stress and maintain the perfect work life balance.